Children: Yes or No?

A children's clothing display in Memorial City Mall, Houston. August 3, 2013.

I’ve never been married. I have no children.

Occasionally, I’m asked whether I want kids.

My biological clock has never ticked.

Growing up, I regularly stated that I didn’t want children. In my midtwenties, after some introspection, I decided that children—for me—would happen only if I shared the experience and responsibility with someone else.

And if found a relationship in which children didn’t fit within our big picture, I’d feel completely okay with that.

I can see healthy, happy relationships in which children would prove a fun, mind-expanding project. And I can see fulfilling relationships in which children don’t quite jibe with plans for travel, creative exploits, business and personal challenges, and other adventures.

Each relationship is a unique, living organism. Like a chemistry experiment, you need to know the exact components to understand what might result. Without a specific life partner, I have no idea whether children make sense for me.

Of course, the decision on whether to have children is highly personal. Anyone else’s thinking likely widely varies from mine.

How did you decide on children?

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